Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Pluto Goes Postal

Astronomers have launched a sky wide hunt for Pluto after recent observations have found it has not stayed on its designated orbit. Authorities have warned the ex planet Pluto may have become angry about being demoted and could seek revenge on those he blames for his perceived loss of status. The recently fired rock mass has left his Kuiper belt home and is believed to be headed towards earth to seek revenge for his dismissal.

A source known to be formerly close to the disgruntled rock is quoted as saying "He has been freezing about out here for 70 years and then he hears over the news that he has been fired, you can understand his anger".

Astronomers organizations attempted to make their position clear. A spokesman said “We demoted Pluto to a non planet just so we could declare it best place ever and king of the solar system in our new “coolest things in the universe” prize ceremony, no not king of the solar system of the universe that’s right. There is no need for Pluto to attend the ceremony as its fabulous prize has already lifted off and is on its way back to where Pluto’s orbit was. And if that’s not a good place for it we could recommend a nice orbital path near Jupiter”.

In an unrelated statement they did say “Now is an ideal time for us to start manned exploration of the solar system. All of our members undertake to take such a journey immediately. Oh if you see a giant sphere asking for us you have not seen us, ok?”

2 comments:

Bionic Laura said...

Scientists deny that Charon has been left in orbit disgused as Pluto and that is why the delay in the observation of Pluto occurred. However one insider did tell us 'well since Pluto had been downgraded we stopped keeping as close an eye on it'. Charon is said to be disgusted with it's partners downgrading and is not convinced by the new offer of best thing in the universe award and was reported as saying it was all just a ruse to divert their attention away from the downgrading.

Max Radical said...

Excellent stuff. The "Pluto is angry over being demoted" stuff is good, though a widespread idea at the moment, but the adding of the prize ceremony and the manned exploration is classic.

Of course, the final line is great.